CHAPTER TWO
His walk hadn't taken him very far. About halfway down the hall to be precise.
Johnny held the glass out in front of him, watching the amber liquid swirl in lazy circles before raising it to his lips again. It wasn't one of his favorite drinks, but it was strong and warm going down. With enough of it, he'd replace one kind of ache for another, and sleep would eventually come. At least something would come.
With his head tilted back and eyes closed, Johnny didn't see the bartender smile and wink before he moved down to the other end of the counter. Soft fingers lightly brushed his neck and played with the hair that spilled over his collar. He took a big swallow and set the glass down.
"I've been looking everywhere for you, Johnny," she said quietly, sliding gracefully onto the stool next to him.
"Been right here all the time."
Overlooking the curtness of his reply, Kelsey felt the tension in his muscles when her hand slid down his back. She leaned her elbow on the bar, trying to get him to make eye contact. "I didn't know you liked brandy," she said casually, surprised when he reacted angrily, as though she had struck a nerve.
"I suppose a clumsy fireman like me should just stick to his beer, huh?"
“That’s not what I said.” Kelsey couldn’t gauge how much Johnny might have had to drink in the last two hours. He didn’t sound overly drunk, but he definitely sounded resentful and on edge. “I don’t understand. Are you… are you letting the things Brendan said bother you? You know, you’re the last man on earth I’d expect to let that happen.”
He shrugged off the comment without looking at her. "He doesn't bother me. Why should I care what he thinks?"
“I don’t know.” Kelsey studied him for a minute, then smiled in delight when she was struck by the unexpected revelation. “Why, Johnny. You’re jealous.” She could tell when his back stiffened she’d managed to rankle his pride with that remark.
"I'm not jealous."
"Well, you shouldn't be," Kelsey scolded lightly. "Brendan and I have known each other since we were little kids. Our parents have been best friends forever. We grew up together. He's like my big brother."
Johnny glanced sideways at her, skepticism furrowing his forehead. "Kelse', any big brother who looks at his little sister the way he looks at you… ought to be in jail."
"You are jealous."
"I'm not jealous," he argued obstinately. "I… I just don't like the guy."
"Brendan can be a real horse's ass sometimes, but he's really a good guy."
"Yeah? I suppose you're gonna tell me I might even like him if I got to know him."
Kelsey leaned closer, and put her hand on his arm, gasping softly as a tingle of electricity flowed through her fingertips and traveled right down to her toes. "I'm not sleeping with him, Johnny."
"That's none of my business," he answered, barely able to maintain his cool facade at her nearness. "I didn't ask."
"No, you're too much of a gentleman to ask, so I'm telling you. I seem to remember you're the one who said he didn't believe in sleeping with another man's woman. I'm just setting the record straight."
She was doing it to him again. Making him crazy.
"I never said I was going to sleep with you," he countered dispassionately.
"No, you didn't. I suppose I'm just jumping to conclusions from all those steamy looks you've been giving me?" Kelsey reached for the tie that still hung loosely around his neck, and pulled him closer until they were cheek to cheek. "So tell me then…," she whispered in his ear, "… what would it take for a nice girl like me to talk you into doing that?"
"I don't know...." Johnny swallowed hard, his resistance completely blown to hell. "…What'd you have in mind?" Watching her head dip back, and her luscious lips part invitingly, it took every ounce of willpower he had to refrain from unzipping his fly and pulling her onto his lap and doing it right there on the bar stool. The image alone made him stiffen and groan.
Kelsey ran her fingers through the back of his hair again, and playfully flicked her tongue over his lips, backing away before Johnny could kiss her. He smelled like a man, of after shave and brandy and masculine lust. It was intoxicating. He was intoxicating. As much as she wanted to strip off their clothes, and have wild and wanton sex on the bar in front of the mirror, decorum dictated they find a more private spot to carry on their “discussion.”
Tugging gently on his tie, she tilted her head in the direction of a booth in a darkened corner of the lounge, away from the band that provided the evening's entertainment. Johnny was the only entertainment Kelsey wanted. With a not-so-discreet brush of her hand against his crotch, her message was sent loud and clear.
Picking up his brandy, Johnny managed to keep enough wits about himself to remember his manners, and ask if she wanted a drink.
With a tiny shake of her head, Kelsey declined. "I've got a lab tomorrow morning I can't miss, and I'll need a clear head." Her eyes glittered, and her lips curved sensually in a provocative tease. "I'll just have a… a little taste of yours."
Johnny suddenly knew what it felt like to be putty in someone's hands. She sure knew how to use that wicked smile on him. It blew him away every time, and made his knees go weak and his dick go hard.
The booth was private, dark and intimate. A perfect place for seduction if there ever was one. Kelsey snuggled against him, determined to erase any doubt in Johnny's mind that she wanted him, and only him.
His hands roamed over her breasts, feeling the hardness of her nipples in contrast to the soft silk of her dress. Johnny bent his head, nibbling her neck, trailing kisses along her jaw, dipping his tongue in her ear. He didn't have to be talked into anything. This entire evening… in truth, this entire week… had been spent thinking about nothing but being with her again.
He'd been fantasizing about it for so long, he didn't waste any time getting to the heart of the matter. "I want to fuck you," he murmured hotly in her ear. "I want to do all sorts of things with you tonight, Kelse'."
Johnny had his own way of making her crazy. He could do anything, have anything he wanted. Kelsey lifted her chin, offering herself with a feral hunger in her eyes that matched his. His mouth took hers in a kiss filled with longing so intensely personal and so passionately intimate, it made her head swim. No one had ever kissed her like that before.
Lost in his desire for her, Johnny's hands stroked her face, then dove into her hair, pulling Kelsey closer. His lips pressed tighter and his tongue thrust harder, deeper, feeling her respond, hearing her moan, until he was sure she couldn't say no to him.
Sudden applause from across the room for the band temporarily subdued their escalating ardor. Kelsey laid her ear against Johnny's chest, listening to the sound of his racing heartbeat and raw and ragged breathing.
Lifting her head, she reached for the drink, but instead of raising it to her lips, dipped her forefinger in the glass. "I don't like brandy much," she whispered demurely, "but I want a taste."
She brought her finger to his mouth, and slowly drew it over his lips. Kelsey slid her other hand to the back of his neck, urging him close again. Her tongue licked, her teeth nibbled lightly, and she sucked his lower lip, drinking in the taste, not only of the liquor, but of him. He tasted good. Musky. Masculine. She wanted more.
His mouth opened, inviting her tongue, inviting her to take a deeper drink of what he had to offer, but she backed away with a cunning smile. Lightly running a hand through his hair, she taunted him with a look that said "come and get me."
She wasn't just making him crazy, she was driving him insane. Thinking two could play the game, Johnny dipped his finger into the glass. Instead of letting him do what she had done, Kelsey's lips closed over his finger. Sucking ever so gently at first, she slowly drew it into her mouth.
It was her turn to make him moan when her tongue swirled and danced over his fingertip, then sensually curled around and licked at the brandy. Kelsey's eyes held his as she slid her tongue down across the palm of his hand, then along the length of his finger again, nibbling, sucking, licking, slowly slipping it in and out of her mouth.
His cock grew as hard as if it was in her mouth. The simulated blow job was the most erotic thing he'd ever experienced. Johnny almost lost what little control he had when Kelsey's other hand went under the table and began stroking his erection. Somewhere in his liquor-fogged, sex-muddled mind, common sense smacked him upside the head to call it quits right now, or risk being the talk of the conference for a long time to come.
"Kelse', stop." Barely managing to exhale the words, Johnny pushed her hand away, physically shuddering with the raging need for her finish what she started. "Not here."
If not for him bringing her back to reality, Kelsey would have parted her thighs and guided his hand under her dress. She was hot, pulsing, eager for him to plunge his fingers into her and make her come all over his hand. She peeled her body away from his, thinking it would give them both a chance to get a grasp on their runaway hormones.
It was too late for that.
He'd gone far beyond that aching feeling. He was so hard, he hurt. Bad. They would make love -- long and slow -- later, all night long. Right now, Johnny needed relief. In a hurry. The way he felt, if the elevator was empty, they'd do it right there.
"My room or yours?" he asked heatedly.
"What?" she uttered, still in a daze. Then reality hit her like a wet rag. Kelsey felt her stomach churn, and almost panicked. It hadn't occurred to her to tell him. She'd apparently left her common sense in some other part of the hotel. "I… I'm not staying here. I have classes tomorrow. I was…. Brendan is taking me home tonight." Her heart wrenched at the torment on Johnny's face, like she'd slapped him, then poured a pitcher of ice water in his lap.
His mood instantly darkened, clouded by anger at the thought she was toying with him again. "If you knew you were goin' home with him--"
"--That's not fair," she bristled, his accusing connotation putting her instantly on the defensive. "You didn't tell me you were going to be here. And, I'm not going home with him. He's taking me home."
Johnny didn't especially see the difference. "Well, if you knew you weren't stayin', why'd you come looking for me?"
"Because you were acting strange all night. You were upset when I had to leave, and then you disappeared. I wanted to make sure you were all right." Kelsey had no idea what she'd been thinking, starting something she couldn't finish. She helplessly groped for an explanation. "Johnny, I guess nothing's changed. I just… I just lose my head when I get anywhere near you. But… it's not what you're thinking. Brendan and I...."
His voice was the last thing either one needed to hear at that moment. They both looked toward the bar. Welles was gesturing, obviously asking the bartender if he'd seen Kelsey.
"What are you gonna do, Kelse'?" Johnny asked in a hard-edged voice.
Johnny's question sounded like an ultimatum. She was the one stumbling now, her cool composure long gone. "Johnny. I… my father...."
"Your father?" he spat out angrily, "or Welles?"
"You… you don't understand. It's not that I… I don't want to stay. I can't," she stressed in desperation. "Johnny, I… I can't. I don't have a choice."
"Oh, I understand all right. You always have a choice, Kelsey." Johnny watched Welles head in their direction before looking at her again. "It's just a matter of whether you want to make one or not."
Kelsey saw that other look in his eyes again. The same one when their conversation on the patio had been interrupted by Brendan. It went far beyond simple jealousy, and she found its intensity unnerving. She was beginning to see it for what it was, though. Male rivalry, as old as time. Johnny was so far off base, it was beginning to make her mad.
"I told you Brendan and I were just friends."
"Open your eyes, Kelse'." Johnny couldn't believe she could be so blindly naive, and it only fueled his rising anger. "Take a real good look. That guy's got a hard-on for you worse than the one I got right now." He slid out of the booth and stood there, waiting, watching her.
Kelsey's cheeks flushed red with denial. "You've got it all wrong, Johnny. Even if it was true -- and it's not -- I've never done anything to encourage him."
Johnny could handle another man in the picture. It was Kelsey's indecision that was about to put an end to evening. "You know, some guys think rejection's a turn on," he said darkly.
"Johnny, please," she begged softly for his understanding.
"I don't happen to be one of 'em. I got better things to do than wait till you make up your mind. You coming with me, or going home with him?"
Her silence was the final straw. Johnny pulled some bills out of his pocket and threw them on the table in front of her. Brusquely brushing past Welles, he left the lounge without once looking back.
She knew the money was for the drink, but couldn't help think Johnny meant something more by it. And, what he meant, cut to the quick. Kelsey glanced up at Brendan, loathing the superior smile in his eyes. She had no idea when this had turned into a contest, and she surely didn't feel like a prize. Still unable to admit Johnny may have seen something that had never occurred to her, she slipped out of the booth, ready to leave. Smoothing her dress, Kelsey drew a deep breath before looking at him again.
"You are a horse's ass...." she said, half to him, half to herself, as she bit back tears of disappointment. "Take me home, Brendan."
For once in his life, Brendan Welles decided to keep his mouth shut, not ask questions, and do what she asked. Taking her to his hotel room would have been preferable. Not a patient man, used to getting what he wanted, he'd waited a lot of years for her to come to her senses and see the light. To see him. He was willing to suffer a little longer, though. After all, he was the one taking her home.
Brendan protectively draped his arm around Kelsey's shoulder, and playing the role of sympathetic big brother to perfection, walked her out of the hotel.
Leaning against the wall at the other end of the hallway, Johnny watched them leave together. He tried to tell himself he wasn't jealous, and that he didn't care.
But, he was. And, he did.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
A long walk, followed by a cold shower, and three beers from the six-pack he'd picked up, had taken a little of the edge off. Johnny thought he should offer Roy a drink when he stopped by, but he wasn't in the mood for company. Not the male kind, anyway.
He had thought long and hard about accepting the offer that had come his way at the liquor store. Getting blown in a dark back alley would have solved one of his problems. It wasn't what he wanted, though. The whole thing with Kelsey was about more than sex, and had been from the beginning, but he had a hard time -- in more ways than one -- getting past that part of his attraction to her.
As far as he could tell, sex was her only attraction to him. That numbing thought was worth at least another beer or two. Getting dumped certainly wasn't a new thing. Though it used to rattle his ego, Johnny had never taken it all that seriously, because most of the time, he had never really taken the relationships that seriously.
Unsure now of Kelsey's motives for coming on to him, and left wondering if she had simply used him to make Welles jealous, Johnny was hurt and confused. It wasn't until he had seen her walk out of the hotel with another man, that he had realized just how much she meant to him. The year he'd spent getting to know her hadn't been spent entirely with the idea of getting her into bed, but when that's where they had finally ended up, it had been the most intimate, most exciting, most satisfying sex he had ever had. Ever. It was more than a physical infatuation, though. Johnny knew he couldn't have had that kind of sex unless he cared deeply for the woman he was with.
Although he had been the one who helped open the door to realizing her dream again of being a doctor, Johnny had been miserable for a month after Kelsey had left for Seattle. He had consoled himself with the knowledge she at least hadn't married Michael. Though his motives had been genuinely altruistic, Johnny had derived some small comfort from that side-benefit. Following his close brush with death shortly after that, it had been her letters and phone calls during his long convalescence that had given him hope there might something more between them than that one night. False hope, apparently.
Making himself more miserable just thinking about her, and convinced she had played him for a fool, Johnny turned on the TV, sat on the bed, and pulled the tab on another can. He was either going to drown his sorrows, or fall asleep trying. Just when he got comfortable and found a show he could tolerate, there was a knock on the door. Roy. When they'd left the station in a rush, he had stuffed Johnny's shaving kit into his bag, and had promised to drop it by before going to bed. Wishing he'd told him to wait until morning, Johnny hoped Roy would understand if he said thanks and goodnight and closed the door.
It wasn't Roy making the delivery.
Damn her.
Kelsey was standing there in a sexy pose, wearing that dress. That maddeningly simple black dress that stimulated his imagination like no flimsy lingerie possibly could. She literally stole his breath. She was barefoot, backpack in one hand, his kit in the other. It pissed him off to see her standing there, smiling like he should be happy to see her. He wanted her so badly he could taste it, and that only pissed him off more.
When Johnny didn't say anything, Kelsey got nervous. "I ran into Roy in the hallway," she said apprehensively. "He said to tell you he'd see you in the morning."
"What are you doin' here?" Johnny looked out the door, scanning the hallway. "Bring your watchdog with you?"
Slightly slurred words didn't conceal the frigid arctic ice in his voice. Kelsey had told herself this wasn't going to be easy, and believed she had come prepared for whatever he was going to deservedly dish out. Not expecting to be welcomed with open arms, she had hoped Johnny would at least give her a chance to explain.
"No, I'm alone. Brendan took me home and as soon as he left, I grabbed some clothes, got in my car and came back." She grew uncomfortable when he didn't move from the doorway. "Johnny, can I come in?"
What little remained of his rational thought processes told him one night with her wasn't worth the long-term heartache. He knew he should have walked away at that point. But, what he knew, and what he did, were two different things.
"Suit yourself." Johnny let go of the door and headed back to the main part of the room, grabbing another beer when he passed the table.
Kelsey followed, waiting for him to say something, anything. But, he just stood there, watching the television, ignoring her, downing the contents of the can. She had no idea how many drinks he'd had earlier in the lounge, but there was only one unopened beer left on the table.
"You're drunk," she said calmly.
"Not even close," he snorted cynically. "Been tryin' all night. You keep interruptin' me."
She tried to take the can from his hand, but it set him off. His pent-up anger exploded like a powder keg with a short fuse. Kelsey jumped when the almost-empty beer can sailed across the room, striking the glass door to the balcony. Johnny whirled around and grabbed her roughly by the arm. Maybe he wasn't drunk, but she didn't think he was entirely sober, either. Kelsey had never seen him so infuriated, and it frightened her enough to take a few steps back.
"Johnny...."
"What the hell are you doing here?" he snapped furiously. "Aren't you afraid your daddy's going to find out? What's he gonna think of his… his little girl coming to some lowly fireman's hotel room in the middle of the night? And, what about Welles.... how's he gonna feel about his little sister screwing a… a piece of shit like me? Is this a game to you, Kelse'? Or, are you here just to prove something to them?"
He was drunk. That's what she told herself over and over. Trying not appear intimidated, she was outwardly collected, but inwardly petrified. Not that he was going to hurt her, but that he was going to throw her out.
"They don't have to know...." Kelsey stopped short, gasping at how horribly wrong that came out. That wasn't the way she meant it at all, but it was painfully obvious by the look of wounded pride in his eyes, how Johnny had taken it. Like she was embarrassed to be seen with him. Like she was using him. Oh, God. "Johnny, you have it all wrong."
"Do I? You should've stuck to your fuckin' rule," he said with sudden calm. "I'm tired of letting you play with me, Kelse'. I'm not some toy you can mess with for a while, then toss aside when someone better comes along." He let go of her arm with a hard shove. "I think you better go before I say something I'm really gonna regret. I don't even know why you came."
Kelsey resolutely stood her ground. "I came because I wanted to. I came because I thought you wanted me to. Don't make me leave, Johnny. I want what you want."
"Yeah?" She had pushed too hard. His embittered emotions unraveled and his last thread of self-control snapped. "You think you know what I want, Kelse'?" Johnny backed her up, and braced his hands against the wall on either side of her head and kissed her hard. His lips were harsh, demanding, spiteful. He couldn't stop himself. He wanted her to hurt as much as he did.
Kelsey squirmed and tried to break free, which only seemed to incite him more.
"This is what I want." Johnny roughly slid his hands under her dress and lifted it to her waist, almost losing it completely when he saw she wasn't wearing underwear. "Is this what you came for?" He forced her to look at him, forced her hand to feel him. Swollen, erect, as angry as he was.
He pinned her again, with his fingers dug deeply into her arms. Kelsey was so shocked, she couldn't speak, and timidly shook her head no.
Johnny yanked her away from the wall, and reached behind her back to unzip the dress. Not quite the mood he had planned for the moment, seeing her naked sent him reeling over the edge. His workout shorts were off before she could blink, and he was pressing into her, hard and ready to take what every nerve in his body was screaming for.
Kelsey fought tears, afraid he was going to hurt her, to use her in ways she had thought he never could, never would. She had trusted him once, and he hadn't betrayed her faith in him then. She prayed he wouldn't now. Her hand stroked his cheek, and her eyes teared, begging him to see what he was doing.
"No. Not like this. Not with you. Please, Johnny," Kelsey's pleading voice was barely audible now, "not with you."
I'm not like those other guys, Kelse'. His own words echoed in his ears, and he stopped short, brought to his senses by the anguish in her voice. Sickened by his own behavior, stunned by the realization he had almost crossed a line he hadn't dreamed he was capable of crossing, Johnny loosened his grip on her arms, and buried his face in her hair. This wasn't the way he wanted it.
"Kelse, I'm sorry," he choked out.
"It's okay." Her whispered voice trembled with relief. "I understand. Johnny, look at me. It's okay."
Kelsey's eyes had no fear, no anger in them. Johnny held her head in his hands, and kissed her hard again, but not like before. He wasn't going to take. This time, he was asking.
His kiss was filled with raw, fiery, aching need. Insistent, passionate, it was the kiss of a man who wants a woman. Wants her so much, he would give anything… anything to have her -- her body, her mind, her heart. All of her. But, not just any woman. THE woman. The one he was meant to be with, the one who gave him his very reason for being. The one who not only excited his body, but who set his soul on fire every time she looked at him. The one who drove him crazy just by being in the same room.
Apologizing over and over, Johnny couldn't keep his hands off her. Not intentionally rough, he was in such a desperate state, he couldn't wait any longer. Kissing her every step of the way, he pulled Kelsey toward the bed.
She went willingly, returning his kisses with an unbridled excitement of her own. Visions of spending another night with him had visited her dreams often, and Kelsey wasn't going to waste any more of the precious little time they would have while Johnny was in town.
They fell onto the bed together, feverishly getting straight to what each of them wanted. Sex. In spite of the night-long emotional turmoil, it wasn't about taking the time to please each other. It was about mindless screwing, getting it on to get off. Fast, hot, sweaty, bodies-writhing, hands-grabbing, sheet-pulling, animal sex.
She was dripping wet and he was hard as stone. Johnny pushed her legs apart and thrust inside her, almost coming the second her muscles clenched around him. He drove in and out, hard and fast, over and over. Kelsey was so hot and so tight, he couldn't get enough of her. Her legs wrapped around his waist, drawing him closer, urging him to go as deep as he could get, while her hips rose wildly to meet his every stroke. He didn't even feel her fingers dig into his bruised back while she held on for the frantic ride.
With a delirious cry, Kelsey came, wet and hot, literally convulsing around him, triggering Johnny's long awaited release. Their orgasms almost lasted longer than the act itself. With their physical needs sated, they clung each other, kissing passionately, hands stroking, petting, not wanting to let go, not wanting to part.
At long last, his emotional high diminished, and Johnny rolled off and lay on his back next to Kelsey. It took several more minutes before he could breathe normally enough to talk.
"Kelse', I'm sorry I hurt you." Remorse, and disbelief that he could have forced himself on her in anger, filtered through his apology.
She turned onto her side, and put her arm around his waist, snuggling close. "You didn't hurt me, Johnny. It was my fault. I can be so stupid sometimes. I probably would have deserved --"
"-- No one deserves to be treated like that," he said sharply. "Don't ever think that way. There's no excuse for the way I acted. None. I'm not proud of it."
Kelsey fell silent. Johnny was different from the men she'd known. He understood a woman wasn't an object to be used and discarded. He wasn't afraid to say he was sorry. In her mind, that made him more of a man than any of the physical endowments he possessed. "Apology accepted," she said quietly. "Will you accept mine? I didn't mean to hurt you either."
Johnny hesitated. It wasn't that easy. As wrong as they were, he understood where his actions had come from. Hers still baffled him, and there was more to it than hurt feelings. "Maybe we need to talk," he said slowly. "Not… not now. But, before I leave."
Kelsey duly noted she hadn't been forgiven, but at least he wasn't kicking her out of his bed. She knew she had made a mess of the entire evening, and it would eventually take more than an apology, and more than sex, to make things right between them again.
Sober now, Johnny rubbed his eyes with one hand, as the reality of what they had done set in. "Kelse', we didn't just do somethin' dumb, did we?"
She raised her head to look at him, not sure what he meant. "Something dumb?"
"We… we're not gonna… you know," he stammered, "we're not gonna get pregnant, are we?"
"Oh. Oh! No," she reassured him. "I'm still on the pill."
"That's good," he said quietly. "I was kinda worried there for a minute."
Kelsey smiled to herself, imagining she had detected a faint note of disappointment in his voice in spite of what he said. As far as she was concerned, it wouldn't have begun to be the dumbest thing she'd ever done. But, it was better this way. She had never pictured Johnny as the settling down type, and certainly not the type to be forced into unplanned fatherhood. The very fact he had said he was worried confirmed her belief.
Johnny laid there thinking he should have felt a stronger sense of relief than he did. The image of Kelsey pregnant with his child surprisingly appealed to him. But, her career plans undoubtedly meant having a baby was a long way off, if she even wanted one. The subject had never come up in any of their conversations. Not that it would have, given their platonic-except-for-one-night relationship, but the thought of making babies with her pleasantly ensconced itself in the back of his mind.
With a tired, audible sigh, Johnny rolled onto his side, and pulled Kelsey closer, putting his hurt aside, forgiving her in his heart, if not in his mind. He loved holding her. It gave him a sense of peace, like coming home after a long absence.
"Johnny?" she whispered softly, "are you falling asleep?"
"Tryin' not to," he answered drowsily.
A minute later, she knew he was out. Exhausted herself, Kelsey didn't mind. Johnny would have to handle some teasing in the morning, though, about how it was supposed to be the woman who fell asleep after sex.
Lying contentedly in Johnny's arms, Kelsey soon drifted off, too, feeling like it was exactly where she was meant to be.
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Dormroom -:-:- Locker
-:-:- Door -:-:- Bunk -:-:- Shower -:-:- Sheets
-:-:- Submissions
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